Ballad of Loreley (11): The Deal


So, if I’m understanding this correctly –and let’s be honest, when AREN’T I– this patch of land, which, mind you, you’ve been notably ABSENT from for
the better part of TWO YEARS, is…. Your property? My, you DO catch on quickly. :3 Even after I’ve already shown you the
documents proving exactly that. I’m sure you can understand my skepticism given the fact that you are the
only other human being I’ve MET in all the time I’ve been living here, and the first thing you do when we DO meet is CALL DIBS. To be fair, the FIRST thing I did was establish that I’ve already played your little game and ask for help. It was only AFTER you decided I wasn’t worth your time that I decided to pull rank on you. Or, uh… Landlord, I guess. Okay, number ONE? I think you’re underestimating the trouble I went to putting together that so-called ‘Little Game” You know, that’s fair. Honestly, the whole multi-layered code that you put together was far from easy to guess, and I had to take quite a few intuitive leaps in order to see the full picture. Your ‘riddle’, your trail of bread crumbs, was more elaborate than deserves being condescended to. Still, I’m relieved that the answer ended up being LITERALLY on my doorstep. (pleased irritation) That brings me to my SECOND point, How the FUCK did YOU manage to piece it together? Show your work. (Oh he’s like THAT, huh?) (How cute :3c) I mean, it’s a matter of finding the cipher that you spread across multiple essays. Once I had the cipher, it was a matter of applying. Plus, because I ALSO make YouTube videos, I recognized an address when I saw one. While it was tedious work, so long as you followed logical procedure, it was pretty straightforward, wasn’t it? …. Huh. Well, this hardly seems like your first rodeo. Do you make a habit out of tracking down reclusive youtubers? Not that I know of. “That you know of”? Care to elaborate? So, here’s the thing. You ever feel like you start something new, only to realize you’re really good at it, like you’ve known how to do it your entire
life? Is that a trick question? No, a rhetorical one. (sigh) Well, I have no memories of myself prior to around 7 years ago. But I keep running into talents and skills that I have, that I have no explanation for. I know at least three languages, I know combat tactics and at least a competent self-defensive move-set in martial arts. I can cook recipes as if by heart, that I’ve never read. I have an encyclopedic knowledge of plants and geology. I know parts of human anatomy that the layman doesn’t really seem to know. But, I have no knowledge of ever learning any of these things, no memory of my own identity before whatever event triggered memory loss. And … no one else seems to even know where to begin. ….That’s actually why I came to you. Because everything in those essays
you wrote tells me… you might understand how someone can have such targeted memory loss, so specific as to feel… Deliberate. I… need your help. (irritated) (contemplative/calculating) (conflicted) (You guys seeing this?) Ughhh….. Well. Call me David Hayward and send my ass to
Pine Valley, I just stepped into an episode of All My Children. (duck noise?) (laughing in genuine amusement) Oh, I know. I couldn’t make it sound more like a Soap Opera if I tried. ‘I have a secret life that I know nothing about! Please help me, super secret hidden Brain Doctor!” …. Wait, ARE you a doctor? That depends on who you ask. That’s not something based on opinion. Either you have the doctorate or not. Oh, you’d be surprised who gets to call themselves ‘Doctor’ nowadays. Or who might argue the semantics of documented education. You’re very good at NOT answering questions. See, THAT depends on WHAT you ask. Well, doctor or not, I have run out of options. I’m not going to beg you for something you’re utterly unwilling to do. I COULD offer you my help in whatever goals you have, and without self-aggrandizing, I believe that is a substantial offer. If you can help me, I would find every way to repay you. I would have no problem letting you stay here, for example, or even keeping your cameras you installed over the five mile radius around this cabin. If you can’t, or WON’T…. (Oh SHIT. She saw those??) (…She did her RESEARCH before coming here.) (… Hmm. This woman is NOT what she seems.) Well. Assuming I choose to believe a word of what you’ve just told me, barring any details you may or may not have left out regarding the nature of your condition, the series of events which quite literally lead you to my doorstep, or your claim to this property, I don’t see myself left with many alternatives either. GRANTED, if I agree to this, you in turn agree to any seemingly unorthodox methods I may wish to explore. We can negotiate the details at your convenience — or, preferably, MINE– but understand that this is no simple undertaking, with no guaranteed solution in the foreseeable future. That is already a more helpful and honest response than I have gotten for seven years. I’m willing to try …MOST anything… if it means having a chance at pulling back the curtain and finding out the truth. And if it doesn’t work the way I hope, well… “Nothing ventured, nothing….gained…:3”
“Nothing ventured, nothing… ….gained…>:[” (laughing)
(Oh I do NOT like this) It sounds like we’re on the same page. So… do we have a deal? ….As it were. I look forward to working with you, then. :3 Oh fine, lemmie show my work. After all, you have to trust that I can back up my words, right? It would be helpful, yes. Has anyone ever told you you’re not nearly as funny as you seem to think you are?>:[ Because I can’t help but feel that statement’s been long overdue>:[ (giggling)

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